Lollygagging

Welcome to the World Baby Boy!

2011-11-29T07:30:00.001-08:00

Dear Ryne,

I'm your Grandma Debbie. Your mommy is my daughter and your sister is my grand- daughter. I love them both so much that sometimes my heart hurts. Now I have you, my grandson. I promise to love you so much too!

Love,

Grandma Debbie

Moose Hunting

2011-09-29T19:55:00.000-07:00

This lollygagger has always felt a connection with the moose. Thanks to the television series "Northern Exposure" the lumbering walk of this animal just screams lollygagging mascot material! So, what a pleasure it would have be to spot one in the wild. According to several waiters in the Jackson, Wyoming area, the mammals are numerous and tend to be vegetarians. The "Mighty Moose Hunters" were hooked and plans were made.

Moose Wilson road in the Grand Teton National Park is narrow, mostly paved and runs through landscapes worthy of oil paints and water colors. At the northern end is the village of Moose, Wyoming. For a flat lander with a desire to see a moose it seemed like a no brainer. The literature said sightings were frequent around watering holes at sunrise and sunset, so the girls went hunting.

Moose Hunt #1: It is 6:30 AM Wyoming time and as our driver minds the road the two look outs mine for moose. A few fellow hunters are spotted in the early morning light, but critters equal zero. The question hanging in the air: is a "moose story" appropriate and if so we need to get the non-facts straight before breakfast.

Moose Hunt #2: It is roughly 6:30 PM Wyoming time and as our driver dodges an apparent bear traffic jam, the two look outs feel a flash of hope. Arriving at the previous moose spotting sight, disappointment grows when there is no place to park. The score board tells the story: beaver - one; ducks - a few; chipmunk - pissed off, and tourists approximately 35 to 45!

Turns out the moose is not the Bullwinkle idiot of my childhood. He is wise to tourist ways! He was probably observing us from the undergrowth and shaking his fifty-plus pound antlers. The folly of humans racing their large fossil fuel burning creatures through protected wilderness to observe dying breeds is dis-heartening!

As the soap box collapses, silent thoughts of gratitude to people with foresight like the artist George Catlin, and Presidents Harrison, Roosevelt and Wilson for protecting some awesome landscape. Silent prayers to elk, moose, wolf and even chipmunks who struggle daily to avoid the creature called human. The plan for the next hunting trip - bring those moose some muffins!

Smile

2011-08-26T13:19:00.000-07:00

People who make me smile!

Camden's creation says "Please come back to Planet Texas"!

Growing Green

2011-08-25T09:22:00.000-07:00

This title and accompanying photos are the inspiration of Camden Tremblay. She is now busy working as a first grader at St. Charles but definitely has a future in photography. This photo of a sunflower, taken by Camden, reflects the power of small things!

She placed a replica of herself in the garden to add a little charm to an old chair.
When not busy capturing floral beauty, her August visit found her creating delectable baked goods. Some of the well-executed creations were for the eyes only. Check out the anniversary cake in the background. Other creations were for culinary enjoyment and proof of her success as the "Cake Queen". Camden loves to dance and was instrumental in the celebration of her Grandparents 37th wedding anniversary. We love you Camden and enjoyed your summer visits!

Blooming Like a Weed

2011-07-20T08:12:00.000-07:00

Sunflowers make me smile. The farmer I married says they are weeds, but weeds are champion adaptors and life is all about adaptability. Are we blooming where we have been planted? Nope, not yet, but some of our weeds are.

How could you not love a face like this?

This previously documented beauty peeks over the fence in search of the sun.

Growing Like A Weed

2011-07-15T11:51:00.000-07:00

Successful gardening in 100 degree weather is all about plant choices. My best performer this first year in Texas is this lovely sunflower. Having positioned the 'sippin cousins' before this leggy beauty untold drama unfurled.

Jude demonstrated just how tall he could reach while Camden snuck in a hot weather hug. Jude shows concern for the cousin attacked by a hoe! Note: same plant, same sweet petunia and same hoe as the June picture.

To all those frustrated, hot parents in Oklahoma and Texas here is a zany Grandma tip. Hook up the sprinkler on a July evening. We have a Scooby Doo sprinkler but anything that sprays water will work. Place it under the swing set and throw balls at your kids. Trust me, they will love it!

My Sweet Petunia

2011-06-27T14:17:00.000-07:00

Camden and I have done lots of reading this June. One source of inspiration was "Fancy Nancy's Favorite Fancy Words". Camden called her Grandpa dapper and I was often referred to as zany . I have described Camden using Nancy's fancy words joyous and gorgeous and we had fun with the word yearn. But my own personal favorite phrase is "My Sweet Petunia".

"My Sweet Petunia" and I made several excursions to the swimming pool and library. A special excursion to the Ft. Worth Science Museum and the National Cowgirl Museum were shared with dapper Grandpa Mike. We improvised many art projects without fiasco and sent them back to Oklahoma as souvenirs.

Zany Grandma Debbie was the hostess of a pink lemonade party and Camden's knack for 'skin the cat' feats drew cheers of Ooh la la!

All this fun with vocabulary inspired song lyrics to the tune of "Oh My Darling" in dedication to my gorgeous, joyous Granddaughter Camden.

Oh, my darlin' sweet Petunia, how I yearn to keep you here.

You'll be lost and gone forever, if you head North, 0h I fear!

Salt Water Up My Nose

2011-06-05T11:51:00.000-07:00

To date Summer 2011 has been busy. Most of my activities have involved wise people under the age of 16. June in review!

What I learned about sand castle building from Jordan: Wet sand sticks to everything, molds nicely and deep down smells bad. People will stop and salute your creations, some will shrug in confusion and little boys will destroy!

What I learned about body surfing from Jordan: Face forward not into the waves, salt water is appropriately named, and sucking it up your nose is worse than it's chlorine cousin. You can read a brief 'how to' on the Internet, but at 55 years of age you are probably not going to look good doing it no matter how successful.

What I learned about shelling (figured it out on my own): It is addictive, will give you a crick in your neck and you must remember to look up occasionally. A revelation to self - in a past life it's doubtful I was someone famous. The probability that I was a mollusk is quite high. I have retained many of the characteristics in this life.

What I learned from Anne Morrow Lindbergh's Gift From the Sea: I'm in transition, the sea gets in your blood and women's lives are complicated!

Sid

2011-03-31T06:14:00.000-07:00

Sid is a seed head. He was created during Spring Break Camp. He is my new friend.

Sid enjoys sunshine and clean water. He likes to have his head stroked.

I cut his hair, but he was OK with that. He is a good friend!

Pitiful.

Can't Wipe Off the Grin

2011-02-11T13:54:00.000-08:00

Thanks to an Oklahoma snow storm, my recent experience with train travel will be filed under "Can't Wipe Off the Grin" in my memory cabinet. Needing to return to Texas, a one way ticket on the Heartland Flyer proved to be comfortable, economical and grinnable!

Standing on the platform I'm a pre-teen again and Grandma and Grandpa Ramsey are hugging me goodbye. They are handing me off to the conductor, bags and snacks in hand and I wave to them from a large picture window, my view for the next 100 plus miles.

It's a comfort to know some things don't change much. The conductor still punches your ticket with a railroad issued hole punch. The muffled sound of wheels on rail accompanied by rail car sway are still cause to doze. Sprinkle in a little Oklahoma snow falling on the back roads and the grin gets stuck.

I plan to share this grin with my grandchild. We will do the silly train walk. We will traipse the moving platform between cars. We will bravely go where grandchildren before us have ventured - the snack car!

You Might Be In Texas...

2011-01-26T12:11:00.000-08:00

when you see the following sign:

DON'T WASH YOUR HORSE ON THE SIDEWALK.

Above mentioned sign resides on the grounds of the Will Rogers Coliseum, home of the Ft. Worth Stock Show and Rodeo. Built by the CCC in 1936, it was the first domed structure of its kind in the world. Along with the Landmark Pioneer Tower it is very art deco and impressive. A good horseman is to be admired, and when kissing the ground, sympathized with. Used to dream of owning a horse like Little Joe's and getting hitched to him, but he moved to the little prairie and had all those kids. Oh well, can still buy a pair of cowboy boots and look the part... with two feet firmly planted in the sod of Texas. Happy trails to you!

Apologies to Rogers & Hammerstein

2010-12-06T13:45:00.000-08:00

There's a bright golden haze on the billboard,
There's a bright golden haze on the billboard.
The smog is as high as an elephants eye,
And, it looks like I35 is backed up clear to the sky!

Oh, what a metro-plex morning,
Oh, what a metro-plex day.
I got an uneasy feeling,
Nothing's been goin' our way.

All the furniture is standing in transit,
All the boxes are still on the truck.
We don't have a big screen, a stereo, a bed,
But the Wyatt is where we've been laying our heads.

Oh, what a metro-plex morning,
Oh, what a metro-plex day.
I got an uneasy feeling,
Nothing's been goin' our way.

All the sounds of the city are blaring,
All the tempers of folks they're a flaring.
The people so busy they drive their cars fast
And an old weepin Okie will come in dead last.

Oh, what a metro-plex morning,
Oh, what a metro-plex day.
I got a sad, sinkin' feeling,
We could be stuck in this state!

Top Down!

2010-11-23T08:31:00.000-08:00

Relocation stress? There are bigger things in this world to think about!

Mile marker zero to the grandest canyon of them all. Why do we stare at flowing water? Why would a man who is known to take landscape shots only, shoot this particular pose?

The north rim is populated with lodge pole pines, aspens (yes, they were golden!) and other species of the conifer family. Different from the south rim, less populated with tourists, and a delightful place to view the sunset.

It is a pre-requisite for visitors to the Grand Canyon to find the highest, most barren point to place themselves for a photo op. "Honey, move back a little, I can't get your head in." Yup, we won't have to move to Texas now.

My favorite family photographer, Uncle Jim. Thanks for the memories!

Bottoms up!

2010-11-22T09:56:00.000-08:00

This fall has not been all relocation stress. We had the pleasure of a canyon tour with relatives and it's time to share the view. Explorers Michelle, Cindy and Debbie prepare to journey into the unknown world of slot canyons.

First stop Page, Arizona and the Antelope Canyon. This canyon is experienced from the bottom up and fall was perfect timing. Single file, shoulder to shoulder gawking would not be enjoyable in the heat of the summer tourist season.

Sandstone walls exposed to water in the form of flash floods, stand strong but flexible. The result is a narrow passage of color, rocky waves and beams of sunlight. Our guide had witnessed the collection of water at the south end of the canyon and the climatic and violent sucking of water through the slot. You do not visit when rain threatens bordering states!

Photographers love this place. The Navajo guides cater to them and if you hang close they will use your camera to demonstrate the best shots.

Page is also the home of Lake Powell and we did the dam tour. Yards of concrete result in miles of electricity production. Dam claustrophobic and a long ride to the bottom where you will find an acre of golf course green Bermuda! From this point the waters of the Colorado continue to the Grand Canyon and so did we. To be continued...

Back Off and Breath

2010-11-10T19:20:00.000-08:00

Wednesday, November 10, 2:00 PM somewhere on a Ft Worth freeway, two vehicles become embroiled in a case of TEXAS ROAD RAGE!

Vehicle one, being of the white bronco variety (WBV), enters freeway at high rate of speed. Vehicle two, being of the burgundy sub-compact variety (BS-CV), slams on brakes and attempts to pass.

WBV simultaneously changes lanes. BS-CV jerks to the right. WBV pursues at 65 mph. BS-CV jerks back to the left. WBV stays in the lead anticipating every move.

Bumper to bumper, BS-CV driver's door opens and angry white male (AWM) tosses drink at WBV. WBV and BS-CV with AWM and un-identified driver (UD) of WBV exit freeway. Stunned Okies (SOs) shout WTH!

Homesick, SOs BOB. TRR not worth DOA.

Home Staging - Part 2

2010-11-05T11:45:00.000-07:00

This morning's termite inspection turned into an interior decorating party for six and according to a weary realtor, the first marathon decorating session occurred last Friday. By default I was the sixth person (still the homeowner) invited today, AWKWARD!

Sometimes my thoughts and my actual live commentary can coincide. This can be unfortunate. I declined to follow the parade but tuned into the action from my computer. The voice in my head on paper:

The female signer of the "contract to purchase" reminds me of my father-in-law's third wife.

Good dirt and mulch did not impress.

Why did I waste money on cleaning the carpets when you are going to put that cheap looking wood down?

Matching toilets and sinks? Are you seriously considering ripping out that bath tub?

Yep, I intentionally installed full view storm doors so your little dog could enjoy them.

"Pristine" and "full of personality" my home really didn't need staged because they are going to change it anyway. Estee, I'm partial to margarita's!

HGTV - Call Me!

2010-10-27T21:14:00.000-07:00

Having spent the better half of two weeks looking for a new home, I have learned the following about home staging.
1. Leaving you wienie dog at large, within the confines of your home, to bark and lunge at prospective buyers will not sell your home.
2. Do not hide dirty, greasy frying pans in the oven. Yes, buyers will look in the oven, and in the shower, and in the garage, etc., and they will talk about you!
3. A new housing addition with 8 foot tall stockade fences and a bail bonds business within walking distance does not raise property values.
4. A cute sign stating that the dog is friendly and may jump on you will not encourage buyers to explore the backyard.
5. Your furniture can be too BIG for your house and displaying everything you own or collect does not a designer home make.

And my personal favorite - panti-shields do not belong in kitchen drawers!

Bottom line - if you are "%$#@" where you roost, you need professional staging help NOW!

Soccer Babe

2010-10-18T11:04:00.000-07:00

Camden scored a goal during Saturday's soccer game and her fans were excited! Her gang in Enid was so happy they made a sign and posed for a picture. "Great job Camden" - Love, Grandma Debbie and Grandpa Mike.

The Speed Limit

2010-09-24T08:12:00.000-07:00

I have reached an age that is easy to remember so to celebrate I'm sharing current and pre-MG pictures of my yard. I've got a cramp from patting myself on the back because I didn't skip the preparation part. I pushed aside my lollygagger tendencies to rush to the end result and amended, dug, and mulched the heck out of new beds freshly released from their prison of sod. I find the end results pleasing. "Happy Speed" Day to me!

No ornamentals were caught grounding this shed in it's past life.

Gaura looks like floating butterflies in the morning...when I get up early enough! I hear it grows in Texas too.

Pictures were mysteriously deleted but I swear nothing was there before I came to town.

I'm so proud of this spot. It was pretty much an accident of plant placement.

NOW...

BEFORE!

Just kidding, but wouldn't it be nice.

Present day 5301 Deerfield...

Historical snapshot of 5301 Deerfield.

The grand entrance garden before.

WELCOME HOME!

Interested buyers should contact ERA Nicholas.

2010-09-01T19:21:00.000-07:00

There are moments in life when it is difficult to breathe. You hold your breath when your daughter gently brushes the mane of her equine companion. You hold your breath when she halters him for a last walk to the pasture. You hold your breath when she kisses him goodbye.

You don't breathe again until you're alone. You don't breathe again until a sunset explodes from under the threat of thunderstorms. You don't breathe, you sob and thank God you were part of a moment that took your breath away.

Poncho, place of birth, somewhere in Texas; final pasture, with love in Oklahoma.

A Picture's Worth...

2010-08-18T07:56:00.000-07:00

A lollygagger is a photo journalist's target audience. We look at the pictures in National Geographic and read the captions. We don't have the staying power to read the entire article. Granted we miss out on multiple conversation starters, but we are visual learners with "memories of a gnat"! That being said, this lollygagger finally purchased a new camera. Nothing fancy or complicated, but one easy enough to add captions to!

First an attractive and willing model prepares to demonstrate standing on one foot.
Outstanding form.

A little pizazz!

And the deed is done.

Sprinkler systems

2010-08-02T07:42:00.000-07:00

Mike loves our in ground sprinkler system and I think it wastes water and is inefficient, so we argue about it. Now that he is working in Texas it's turned off and only used when the grass looks stressed - "winner, winner, chicken dinner!"

Gloating aside, last night I attempted to make it more efficient by adjusting a couple of sprinkler heads in the front flower bed. Two heads in particular are worthless. One I can't do much about and one ... well it was buried under a lot of good dirt. It disappears under that dirt when the water is off and pops up when the water is turned on. In order to find it/adjust it you have to have the water on - especially when performing repairs single-handed.

I'm feeling very special with my muddy hands and tools and positive that the neighbors are admiring my self-sufficiency when a geyser of water explodes from the head in question. It launches the top of the sprinkler off at least 12 feet into the air and becomes hopelessly lost in the nice thick turf of our front yard. Now I have an exposed opening in a 6 X 6 inch hole that gurgles and fills with water like a bubbling spring.

No problem, I'll water this area by hand and tell the system when to water the rest during this week of 100 plus temps. Sounds good in theory but, apparently when you tell the system to water the north and northeast side of the yard it also waters the front flower beds. "Loser, loser become a boozer"!

I'm determined to become a reformed lawn owner in my new locale. A cool web-site to check out is www.lawnreform.org. Wish me luck!

Depressed and Miffed!

2010-07-05T16:00:00.000-07:00

When I envisioned trying new things during my lollygagging years, I DID NOT foresee myself moving to another state! Yup, Texas is sucking all the Wolf sisters into the giant vortex of that damn star you see hanging over every fireplace mantle and on every flat exposed outdoor surface. I'm depressed and miffed and still struggling with remembering my Enid phone number, but my spouse seems happy and up for the challenge.

So, I will search the web for affordable housing, but I will heed the words of Caleb Koos, "Don't drive", in Ft Worth! My conditions to date: a home in the Wise county area with easy access to Highway 81; ability to see the sunset; a golden retriever and ... the guts to make this major midlife change.

I just hope the person who buys our house appreciates good dirt!

Recreating Memories

2010-05-14T07:34:00.000-07:00

When my sister Diane found herself depressed and miffed to be back in Texas a few years back, the two of us embarked on a Hill Country road trip to prove there is merit to the state. We dubbed it "Looking for Lyle" to honor the unique and quirky of the landscape and the inhabitants. The events of that week still make us smile, and she was hoping to introduce some of this enchantment to our parents and Donice.

The first gem, Knot on the Loop saloon, was in it's "sometime not open by noon" mode so we couldn't stop and find our dollar among hundreds tacked with flair to the bar ceiling. Robin and the dog Shamu will be sorry she missed us!

Next memory stop - Luckenbach. A magical place of live oak and local talent strumming and singing with the music breaks covered by Cowboy Poet Walt. The magic on this trip was stampeded by 200 Young Life teens converging by bus to the dance hall. The local talent decided he couldn't compete with the noise and commotion, but Diane made sure Walt provided us with some stories. Fred just kind of shook his head and had a look of why am I here on his face.

The bats at the railroad tunnel didn't perform, and the new dive featured as having one of the ten best burgers in Texas was not a unanimous favorite. The Wildseed Farm poppies saved the day for photo opportunities and stories of LBJ's amphibious car at the Western White House provided more quirk.

Think this pillow speaks for all Texans! Thanks for the memories.

Bovines and Blue Bonnets

2010-04-16T10:35:00.000-07:00

The Willow City Loop is a 13 mile drive through privately owned Texas geology interspersed with shades of blues, yellows, reds and whites. I have been fortunate to make this trip with multiple family members and this second version was at the height of wildflower mania. The humans were approximately of the same generation and were an unlawful bunch. 'Don't Get Out Of Your Car' signs are abundant and progressively aggressive as you motor through this heaven, but wildflower fever had all in it's clutches. You have to wonder how this increase in activity is viewed by local cows.

The Bovine Herd-All lead story for peak wildflower season might read: "Two Legged Critters Stampede" - Moos from every curve of the Willow City Loop report rolling feed wagons follow nose to tail with frequent stops to gaze. Feed doors open but the only thing dropping to the ground is moseying in mass along bar ditches. Local matron Bessie warns "all them skinny, rangy types seem to be inflicted with silver canker eye." Sheriff Bull advises pasture members to stay clear of the road and nap in the mesquite until peace and quite returns to the Coal Creek canyon area.

Happily no human critters were shot, gored or hit by a rolling feed wagon. Happy was time spent with sisters and parents chasing down hill country lanes. Happier will be the two legged and four legged residents when those bloomin' weeds dry up.

Garden Stress

2010-03-31T20:34:00.000-07:00

Enrolling in the Master Gardener program was good for my brain and forced me to get out and meet new people. Unfortunately I didn't anticipate the pressure receiving this title was going to place on me. Now I can't just dig a hole and throw a plant from Lowe's in it. I have to research its water, light and nutritional needs and we didn't discuss landscape design. Will I have textures and colors that work well together and be balanced symmetrically or asymmetrically? Will I go to gardening hell for ripping out two perfectly healthy holly bushes? It has gotten too complicated and way too stressful!

My soil has been amended, but is still lumpy, I forgot to add the nitrogen and phosphorus, which means my dirt is deficient. My house faces NW and the front porch garden is a micro-climate yet to be zoned. To date this six by nine foot area is valued at roughly $185, with no guarantees. It is 8:38 AM and I'm headed to the backyard to amend a new plot for an erroneous planting of an Euonymus.

"My paws and claws and elbows hurt. I have a pain across my back", quote I from the Digging-est Dog. I fear I'll never get the knack and have to give my label back.

Yet Another Embarrassing Catholic Moment

2010-03-26T16:07:00.000-07:00

Following Ti Chi Chih class I was invited to dine with two nuns, a priest and a fellow TCC student. The new me replied positively and offered TCC friend Martha a ride. This is where it gets interesting. My four lunch dates were going to celebrate mass prior to grub. Martha invited me to mass, I obliged.

When the congregation is this small it is hard to be an incognito Protestant and when your three buds go forward you get lovingly invited as well. We stop and I mumble along and we take another step and we are at the same level as the priest. We turn and face the empty pews and join hands. Surprisingly I'm still very relaxed, probably the positive energy summoned with Ti Chi, until the priest offers me communion.

Red light, I'm not confirmed, this is against the law! I'm crossing my arms, practically beating my chest and he gestures again for me to partake. But this is Jesus and I have gum in my mouth. Do I spit it into my hand, swallow it, what is the protocol here?

I mouth the words "I have gum in my mouth" and whether he understands or just gives up, he blesses me and moves on. A missed opportunity or yet another learning experience on the road to spiritual development. Let's hope God has a sense of humor.

Peer Pressure

2010-03-22T06:53:00.000-07:00

Mike has returned to his Catholic roots and is attending mass every Sunday. As a part of his renewal the priest suggested he attend the RCIA classes. This is where you learn about the Catholic faith in preparation for confirmation. Being of a footloose nature in this stage of my life, I went too. Surprisingly I enjoyed and looked forward to Tuesday night until today. This week, if I'm not careful, I could accidentally become Catholic!

Yup, I'm feeling some peer pressure. When asked "Why are you here?", my answer "I came with him", sounded lame, so I took the little church permanent record information sheet. My husband would be happy, my family confused and the word permanent scares the hell out of me. My theological reference book of choice, Catholicism For Dummies, gets down and dirty and it's the transubstantiation thing I have a problem with. Since I perceive this to be the core of the Catholic faith, with all due respect, I will decline.

But here is the problem, do I show up for the special mass and support my fellow graduates and politely say "No Way", or do I fake an upset stomach and be a no show. Peer pressure raises it's ugly head once again.

Pulling Taffy

2010-03-06T08:02:00.000-08:00

I'm studying the moving meditation of T'ai Chi Chih with an accredited instructor, Sister Mary Ann Cirillo. To date we have learned ten movements and as Sister Mary says " that's a nice one" describes them all. But, this week she introduced Pulling Taffy and it's three variations.

Chi is the Chinese word for the intrinsic energy that flows through the meridian channels in your body and when your Yin/Yang (positive/negative) energy gets out of whack your body is open to disease, distress and disharmony. The circular movements of TCC help center and balance the Yin/Yang and "people have reported many physical, emotional, mental and spiritual benefits of regular practice".

Sounds groovy, and one is feeling the cosmic energy surging after having pulled it in from the farthest star and then you start Pulling Taffy. Your brain awakes from oneness with the universe and you have to think left hand over right, lead with right leg, step left heel down...confusion. Now, Anchor Step variation with its knock knee pose and the Yin and Yang are getting agitated and you want to let forth with a violent "Hah" karate sound. A little peace is restored when Wrist Circles variation lulls you into thinking "that's a nice one".

Finally, Perpetual Motion variation and you are swinging from the hips, grabbing that taffy, flinging it onto the opposite wall, stepping heel first and find your feet getting farther and farther apart. Clearly you are out of balance in the universe and thankful no one is watching because every other student is also lost in space. Class ends with the realignment of energy through the Cosmic Consciousness Pose and you feel relaxed and triumphant. You will continue to learn and do this quirky stuff because eventually even Pulling Taffy will become "a nice one".

Comfort Food

2010-02-21T15:35:00.000-08:00

Mike had a very bad day Saturday. My parents bake comfort goodies for those in need, so I decided to follow suit. I aproned up and searched non-profit cookbooks for a coffee cake to warm a distressed soul. It would be unethical for a lollygagger to have all the necessary ingredients on hand, but Wilma's (last name shall remain anonymous) Coffee Cake came the closest. After all, Mike was on the way home and could stop for buttermilk!

This was a three part formula. The damp ingredients, the dry ingredients and the crunchies. It required three bowls and a division of placement in the baking pan. That is when the problems began. You see Wilma said to use a loaf pan and I was focused on following the directions to the letter.

Reminiscent of Mt. St. Helens, batter began to overflow after 12 minutes at 350 degrees. The resulting burning embers clung to the oven racks, plopped onto the hot oven floor and filled the house with a smoky, burnt cake aroma. A cookie sheet placed under the cauldron enabled St. Coffee Cake to continue erupting in hopes of a finished product, but after an additional 10 minutes to the prescribed cooking time it became apparent that the center would not solidify.

The following picture does not capture the depth of the cauldron, but does establish that there was some salvageable parts crusted along the edges. I shared a serving with Doug, who also had a very bad Saturday, but discovered he failed to enjoy the full sample. Although this cooking experiment turned out "uncomfortable food" I may try St. Coffee Cake again, but Wilma, I will use a bigger baking receptacle.

Hoarbutt

2010-02-02T14:07:00.000-08:00

Definition: A direct result of indiscriminate snacking and marathon TV sessions due to cabin fever. Symptoms include an increase in lower region girth, noticeable "jiggly" type movement when leaping (Ha!), and a snuggy fit in pants which does not contribute to body warmth. YIKES!

Hoarfrost

2010-01-31T14:46:00.000-08:00

Mike announced this morning that we had a hoary frost outside and before I panicked I peeked, with relief, to find no black clad, wart-nosed figure laying prostrate on our lawn. With pleasure I did view bare tree limbs dressed in wedding white frosting to match the 8 to 10 inches of snow on the ground. Yes, it is a word which defines ice crystals that form a white deposit on objects and one definition denoted that this occurred especially on outside objects. If this phenomenon happens inside, run to Lowe's and buy weather stripping and if you are looking for a snow shovel, sorry they are sold out!

So, I googled cabin fever next in my winter word search and in .23 seconds 2,310,000 hits were returned. There is a horror film bearing the title "Cabin Fever", legitimate cabin rental companies, a decor company and a knitting pattern site. One can research the symptoms and cures for being confined by ice fog, freezing drizzle, snow, sleet and endless days of gray. One can gaze in horror at scary ice particles clinging to "outside" landscapes or one can watch three hours of "Burn Notice" and eat macadamia nut cookies. It's all relative.

An Equine State of Grace

2010-01-11T14:00:00.000-08:00

A ranch horse from birth, he was purchased in west Texas by a couple of greenhorns with an ache to go western. He patiently adapted to ranchette life and provided organic material and entertainment. When the ache faded, he headed north to Oklahoma and enjoyed many a grazing hour with calves, cats and ranch dogs for companions.

Poncho fulfilled a dream of two teenage girls and the tack decorated the barn where the smell of horse and leather welcomed. He was an uncomplicated friend. He listened without judgement, provided a broad, warm back to lean on and was always ready for a romp to the pond. He never did anything stupid. He never tossed anyone to the ground. He never kicked or bit anyone. He was sturdy, strong and dependable.

Forever adaptable, Poncho adjusted to fly spray, horse trailers, novice riders, new horse friends and even blankets. He is loved and cared for, but older everyday. When he does decide to move to his final pasture, here's hoping it has a strong fence to lean on, old friends to nudge and plenty of grass to graze.

"In the Bleak of Winter"

2009-12-24T11:59:00.000-08:00

It's Christmas Eve, there is a blizzard raging outside and James Taylor is singing Christmas tunes on the CD player. A trip to El Reno is planned for tomorrow, weather permitting, but today is on hold. I could get philosophical about the circle of life represented by the blowing snow in the play room window, or regale you with the joyous mess of making gingerbread cookies with a grandchild. I could recount the pride of witnessing a niece graduate with a master's degree or share the laughter of elves and reindeer in a family Christmas review. I could bore you with the past years' travels, accomplishments and things to come or I could just be thankful I'm warm, fed and a member of a loving extended family and wish you...

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Free As a Bird

2009-12-15T15:10:00.000-08:00

I recently observed the one year anniversary of my retirement and celebrated with a trip to the Salt Plains National Wildlife Refuge. My goal was to see an eagle and Mike's goal was to get home in time for the Dallas Cowboys game. The day was perfect, the lake was full and the birds were numerous and vocal.

We didn't see an eagle but a very fashionably attired bird watching couple did. The man's response to questions concerning eagle viewing locations was "just keep looking up". I think I'll adopt this slogan for RY2 (retirement year two). It's catchy, positive and incorporates clouds! As for the eagles, they have an appointment to appear at organized watches in January. Mike has calendared the dates in his blackberry.

Gingerbread Apology

2009-12-04T07:34:00.000-08:00

My non-lollygagger Mom has been constructing gingerbread homes in a variety of designs for her grandchildren and greats since the early 1980's. Traditionally these yummy homes have received their final decor on Thanksgiving weekends and were lovingly boxed for the trip home. Once home, they have decorated mantels, sheltered a mouse, and disappeared piece by piece over the advent season. It occurred to me that my participation in this ritual has been minimal, and other than supplying two grands and a great, I have contributed nothing but after construction maid service.

Making an appearance in Europe via the crusaders, gingerbread has been smashed into molds to decree the days news, formed into man by Queen Elizabeth I, and if privileged eaten as a gold iced cookie. Considered an art form in Germany, gingerbread houses became popular after the Brothers Grimm scared the devil out of little ones with "Hansel and Gretal". It was those German settlers who brought this 19th century custom to America and the home of Fred and Marjorie Wolf.

Decorator age limits remain hazy with 21 years old being the limit, unless you are without spouse and above average design ability. Aunt Diane supplied the spicy smelling sheds this Thanksgiving and Jude, Camden and Josh adorned them with mortar, M&M's and bright colored confections supplied by Mrs. Carel. Jordan and Jackson were in Kansas City, but their homes patiently await paint and I vacuumed.

So Mom and Dad, thank you for starting and continuing this family tradition. I appreciate the hours of planning, experimenting and baking which have developed into afternoons of fun and memories.

How to Cut Bangs.

2009-12-03T07:22:00.001-08:00

Not everyone appreciates the variety of YouTube instructional videos available on the Internet!

Soil Samples

2009-11-19T12:52:00.000-08:00

I am due to begin the Garfield County Master Gardener program next Tuesday and we are to arrive with a $100 check and a bag of dirt. Not just any shovel full of dirt, but a representative sample of our non-cultivated fields. I am excited and don't want to look like a complete slouch, so I prepared a graph with a semi accurate diagram of my house and the existing cultivated beds. I have plotted my sample sites with a little "s" and will be using a spade since a soil probe is not handy! I feel very scientific at this point. It is 3:00 and I plan to allow five minutes per 20 plugs at a depth of 6 inches - Ready, Set, GO!

OK, I finished in 25 minutes! Five minutes per sample was an overkill estimate. One hour and 40 minutes would have resulted in a lot of dirt. There are concerns. As in a urine test, do you fill up the bag (cup) to the brim, or does the lab need just a test tube full? What if there are 21 plugs in the bucket and some grass. Also it's doubtful this dirt all came from the precise six inch level of mother earth and I've yet to sample the seven to 24 inch center of the earth's core as suggested. There was a curious sucking sound emitted from 65% of the sample sites but unfortunately the test bag has no box to mark for DROWNING GRASS.

In conclusion my test field was definitely random, my method of obtaining samples was simple and I'm erring on the side of "less is best" so my work for this day is done. Garden on and may all your dirt be rich.

Clouds

2009-11-16T15:35:00.000-08:00

Cloud watching might just be the perfect lollygaggers activity. There is not a designated location, time or dress code for this sport. Words like intermittent, partly and interval are used to describe cloud cover and radar maps display brilliant colors of greens, pinks, reds and yellows. You can get academic and learn the proper names or you can see your favorite dog, zoo animal or Disney character floating overhead. Georgia O'Keefe clouds grace the skies of New Mexico and clouds are featured in art world wide. For $4.00 you can join the International Cloud Appreciation Society based in the United Kingdom. You won't be expected to attend a meeting, but you get a badge and a certificate and I'm providing a link to their cool web-site on the right!

According to the November 23, 2009 issue of Time magazine, members of the previous mentioned society are considering the clouds pictured above as a new formation. The undulatus asperatus is described as an "ominous-looking formation resembling a rolling seascape" and Time listed this discovery as 49th of the "50 Best Inventions of the Year" for 2009. I'm confused, is the cloud formation itself the invention or is the discovery and naming of said formation the invention? It will be interesting to see how this news is handled by society members and if the cloud formation is the winner does that make God the inventor?

Typos

2009-11-06T17:42:00.000-08:00

My editors called and reported problems with years and dates in my latest posting. I made the requested changes and appreciate any help offered with spelling, grammar and facts. Making the changes lead me to view a new blog by librarians who deal with on-line catalogs on a daily basis. It's informative in a quirky way, a little anal, but I'm adding it to my blog list!

"Good Times"

2009-11-06T12:24:00.000-08:00

Our connections to places and events evoke memories, and a recent visit to Ark City summoned a few good ones. Mom, Dad and I attended the 78th Arkalalah parade held yearly on the last weekend of October. Begun in 1928 to lift morale and relieve the doldrums, Arkalalah means good times and food, and my people have enjoyed the activities from its inception. In the 60's, the Wolf girls marched as the scarecrow, the lion and the tin man of "Wizard of Oz" fame and Mike's pre-marriage introduction to all my Grandparents occurred on this festival weekend in 1974.

It was fun to watch my mom visit with high school friends and hug strange men! My parents were married 55 years ago at the United Presbyterian Church and I have memories of my Grandpa Ramsey greeting church goers in the foyer as I headed downstairs for the all Sunday school sing along. I can still feel the breeze of a summer Sunday generated by the furious flapping of the cardboard fans provided by a local funeral home. As a child, funeral home fans were fascinating but now I get the consumerism behind advertising such services in 90 degree heat to the religious.

We connected with my Uncle Doyle and wife Carol for lunch, connected with Susan's nephew Daniel Weger, the tall trombonists on the front lines of the Kansas State band and left the parade a bit early because we had no connections with anyone else on the floats!

One final connection was Mom's peek into her past at 209 N. "A" Street. She lived in this house from the fourth grade through high school, her best friend Pam lived a street over and a good looking kid named Fred bounded up those stairs in a lettermans jacket to court her. If it weren't for that connection I wouldn't be here!

Full Circle

2009-11-02T15:18:00.000-08:00

The grand finale of Custer State park was the Wildlife Loop. We almost skipped the chance to find the buffalo corrals but set forth without a map and close to dusk, on this our final adventure. I've documented this excursion with a slide show and lyrics from "Home, Home On The Range", the Kansas state song. What a surprise to discover a fellow Kansan wrote the words to this much sung ditty and you're welcome to hum along!

Needles Highway

2009-10-27T09:07:00.000-07:00

Blast it and they will come to this Black Hills area of granite. Making this possible required tons and tons of TNT to create tunnels and roadways through some of the oldest exposed rock in North America. Completed in 1922, the Needles Highway was either named for what I think of as "thread the needle tunnels" or in some eyes the needless expense of all those explosions. The result is stunning and Oklahomans, Texans and "Wisconsin people" oohed and aahed and shot photos at scenic lookouts. Once again the use of logs to create guard rails was appreciated and one wondered at the possibility of an RV fitting through one of the "toot your horn" tunnels.

Diane and I gathered info from a Josh-a-like concerning the popularity of rock climbing in the Needles area. He claimed it is a safe sport and he himself had fallen over 40 feet and survived with no lasting effects. Those short-cut to heaven granite spires look like the perfect climbing surface, but a Fredism "let's leave before he falls" sounded like a good idea to flatlanders.

I'm sorry but there is something wrong with this picture! Velcro, white leather Nikes are old man shoes not a rock climbers daily wear. Reminds me of a time when the Newton cousins and the Wolf girls laughed at an elderly man water skiing very slowly by our summer campsite. Upon his return trip he was skiing backward. The lesson learned has new meaning at this phase of my life.

At the peak of the drive was Sylvan Lake where I have visions of couples rowing and flirting on the mirror like waters. The original lodge burned but it's location is prime real estate and those boating couples probably strolled through this same walking tunnel for some late night smooching.

Hiding behind some questionable architecture, the present day lodge offered a lobby worthy of Teddy Roosevelt and his hunting buds and buffalo burgers in the dining room. Voted the favorite drive by members of the Honda CRV, the Needles Highway will meander on in our memories. According to Peter Norbeck, a force behind all this wonderful development, this highway should be enjoyed by walking the 14 miles. He must have been in pretty good shape!

"Those Guys In The Rocks."

2009-10-22T08:23:00.000-07:00

On an afternoon in July, sometime in the 70's, I recall sitting in a Rapid City cafe with a harvest crew and thinking that our time could be better spent eyeballing Mt. Rushmore. That thought didn't materialize into action, but I have rectified the injustice in 2009.

The Iron Mountain road to Rushmore is 17 miles of captivating scenery, pigtail bridges, one lane granite tunnels and a couple of Fredisms. A delight to plains dwellers, pigtail bridges are shaped like...pigtails! You drive over them and squeal with wonder when you drive under them. Anticipation built as " those guys in the rocks" peered at us through the pines and prompted a comment from the navigator -"I don't know how we're going to get over to them rocks, there is a big ditch in between" but arrive we did and the awe began.

Wisdom comes with age and in many forms, so we think a fifth face would be a nice addition, but when the sculptor declared the work done on October 31, 1941 no changes could be made from that point on. A few facts - the mountain was accidentally named for a New York lawyer; 90 % of the work was completed with dynamite; Lincoln was originally supposed to have an ear and no one died during the 14 years of on again off again drilling and blasting.

The last remaining member of the crew to have worked on the faces was holding court in the gift shop. Nick the driller had no fear of heights, a chiseled face, short clipped answers and was possibly in the process of turning to granite. I think he was tired of tourist and just wanted you to buy his damn book and leave him alone with his memories. Snarfiness aside, it was an honor to shake the hand of living history and thank him for his contribution.

The idea, the task and the finished masterpiece defies adequate description. I still regret not seeing this granite symbol of America in the 70's but my hope is that no rustic logs were harmed in the building of the modern entrance, parking garages and tourist venues.

South Dakota

2009-10-21T11:25:00.001-07:00

I was impressed with Custer State Park, our base of exploration for "The Mount Rushmore State". The State Game Lodge, within the park, has the distinction of being a one time summer retreat of President Grover Cleveland and it is rumored that President Eisenhower cut his golf game short to spend three nights there in 1953. We didn't see their ghosts, but did see the rooms they slept in. Mom preferred Roosevelt's digs, but felt Mamie would have been less than satisfied with the small accommodations.

Our cabin sat west of the game lodge and was probably built by the CCC in the 1940's. We were greeted by an American buffalo and the American porta-pots, both remnants of the three day round-up held prior to our arrival. Amazingly, little else remained of the reported 10,000 souls who gathered to "whoop and holler" the buffalo into the corrals."Wildlife at large" signs were true to their word as I can attest to the viewing of multiple bison, prairie dogs, deer, antelope, female bighorn sheep and a vehicle favorite - the begging burros. We thought we were special, but apparently these little ponies work this stretch of road daily and have a long history of deceit.

After a glass of wine on the porch of the lodge, Diane and I decided to stalk a local brute at dusk. By hopping from cabin to cabin, and then leaping onto a picnic table, we were able to snap his picture incognito. He probably worked this group of cabins nightly and went home to complain to the wife about crazy tourists.

Worthy of time and gas are three scenic drives within the park - the Iron Mountain Road, the Needles Highway, and the Wildlife Loop. Stay tuned for pictures and commentary. I'm sure are dusky friend can't wait!

A Little Corn to Brighten the Day!

2009-10-15T09:29:00.000-07:00

Nebraska

2009-10-13T14:43:00.000-07:00

During the harvest phase of my marriage, I did time at a truck stop in Alliance, Nebraska. That muddy, wheel packed, corner lot of the world was called Terrible Terry's and my memories are not fond. I was determined to gain a new perspective of the state that supplies so much in the way of basic necessities to the world - starch and cholesterol. I had planned two stops of interest - The Golden Spike and Carhenge!

First, a swift drive-by of a Frank Lloyd Wright house and a Carnegie Library building was accomplished and it was north to North Platte. In this city, the Golden Spike tower contemplates the world's largest classification railroad yard at work. You can climb the eight flights of stairs to the observation deck where you will find an engaging view of trains being built and engines repaired. The scene was a delight to old, new and wanna be railroaders. My favorite "old railroader" posed on the windy outdoor deck in view of one of the few railroad yards he wasn't transferred to!

There were some spontaneous moments. For example, we visited this little fixer upper sod house with a welcoming prairie matron. Once occupied by the Rev. Clary of the Methodist persuasion, it was located on the Oregon Trail and had barrel cactus sprouting from the roof. I hope Estee and Jason don't get transferred there.

Fence posts adorned with cowboy boots started showing up in Nebraska. According to one source this posting was done in memory of one's favorite horse, a hired hand or a rancher who had gone to the great beyond. Or, the boot was simply a signal that the dude was home!

Had I known I was within two miles of Carhenge in the seventies, it might have given my time in Alliance meaning. Diane and I have now visited two interpretations of Stonehenge, one in concrete and one in Chevys.

How about those Methodist! According to a historical marker Narcissca Whitman and Eliza Spalding were trail blazers and martyred missionaries, who followed the north side of the Platte river on horseback and became the first white women to cross the American continent. I don't think we are related.

Our "get there before dark schedule" served us well as we left Nebraska and ventured into "Wildlife At Large" Custer State Park. So long Nebraska and thanks for the corny hospitality.

Good riddance Terrible Terry's!

Kansas

2009-10-04T13:55:00.000-07:00

I was fortunate to experience a fall road trip through Kansas, Nebraska and into South Dakota with my parents and sister, Diane. We made an effort not to travel interstate highways, and with the navigation skills of my Dad, stayed on scenic two lane roads. West of Enid, the tone for the trip was set with the sighting of 100 plus pink pelicans heading south to warmer waters. Marjorie reminisced about Lake Perry and the first of several Fredisms rang out from the back seat - "There's some cows"!

My people have taken their first breath, toiled at their chosen professions and lain down for their final rest in the state of Kansas. I'd like to think that they took advantage of this "country road landscape" with determination, humor and gratefulness. Towns named Pretty Prairie, Serenity and Hoxie proclaim "Good Crops, Great Families". Wind mills and farmsteads share the scene with wheat, milo and corn fields and the occasional water tower marked HOT and COLD.

Evidence of that determination cropped up north of the Oklahoma border in Kiowa. It is here that Carrie Nation "launched her career of saloon-smashing". On June 1, 1900 her weapons of choice were stones, brickbats, full malt bottles and one billiard ball. Six months later she adopted the use of the hatchet and possibly inspired my Grandma Ramsey to join the Women's Temperance Union. Grandma would be proud of daughter Marjorie, who was seen pouring out libations, but I question her granddaughter's weapon of choice!

Don't go there, Fred!
But if you do, you can atone for your sins at the First Presbyterian Church in Pratt, Kansas. The sermon title for the week was "Do you Tremble When You Hear God". Maybe you will tremble when you gaze at the gargoyles staring at you from the tower!

Lunch was a picnic at Fort Larned with a surprise lemon pie, homemade by Marjorie, in honor of my birthday. The delicious flaky crust was practically airborne thanks to the windy Kansas plains and the meringue would have made a pioneer lady proud. Fort Larned is a National Historic site of sandstone buildings restored and furnished to preserve a history of protecting travelers and commerce on the Santa Fe Trail. Marjorie shared the history of old Ozawkie with a park ranger, I appreciated the lack of utility lines on the grounds and Diane, WELL...

Fred can be seen on the porch to the right with his arms crossed, undoubtedly wondering what he has gotten himself into. Our next stop was Hays, Kansas for supper. We were only halfway to our nighttime lodgings and it was already 6:45 PM. This situation prompted the often heard Fredism - "Gotta get there before dark".

Thanks Fort Larned for protecting my people! God Bless Kansas and John Denver, may he rest in peace!

Singing Down Country Roads.

2009-09-27T19:31:00.000-07:00

Day one of "Road Trip Rushmore" and without benefit of pictures and my own computer, I will let John Denver describe the trip so far.

"Yes, and joy was just the thing that he was raised on
Love was just the way to live and die
Gold was just a windy Kansas wheat field
Blue, was just a Kansas summer sky."

My Bucket List

2009-09-23T09:38:00.000-07:00

We had a fun evening Monday night visiting with two GTI employees. Over ribs and beans, I learned that Rusty, the TM from Amarillo, owned several bars in his past life and Gary, the FSC out of Albuquerque, was a highway patrol officer who most likely arrested some of Rusty's patrons. Helpful info was shared on the best time to buy Indian handicrafts, ordering Jack Daniels and coke, and how to get a HP officer to change your tire! It was Rusty who brought up the concept of the "bucket list". Rusty is on that glorious downhill slide to retirement and mentioned a couple of things he plans to do before he "kicks the bucket".

Of course this got me pondering the contents of my "bucket list". I'm afraid it has grown rusty with the stresses of past employment etc., but now is my time to update that list! This list will be confined to things I would like to accomplish or explore. I do not plan to include deeds of a noble nature on this list. I have been fortunate to accomplish prior life goals, but I will be looking at this list through the lens of retirement.

To be explored: the Grand Tetons, Alaska, Zac & Cindy's beach house, Georgia O'Keefe's Ghost Ranch and the O'Keefe Museum, the Grand Canyon Phantom Ranch, Montana and Glacier National Park, and Black Mesa.

To be accomplished: find Lyle Lovett, get Mike in a T-38 Talon jet at Vance, and try fly fishing.

Looks like a good start with some overlapping and challenges. To discover the Phantom Ranch I will have to accomplish a hike in and out of the Grand Canyon, Lyle probably doesn't want to be found and taking all those road trips will require finding the perfect work from home job. Better give Zac and Cindy a call for starters.

Set Them Free!

2009-09-21T11:36:00.001-07:00

If you paid attention in grade school you know something about caterpillars and their evolution, but did you know if you Google the word you can get as many as 866,000 hits? If you narrow it down by adding the word moth, you reduce that number to a workable 110,000, because unfortunately we don't all evolve to become butterflies. Now, if you have caught three, and Camden has named them - Catti, Pilli and Tilli - you might be inclined to research what kind of little woolly worms were dining on your oregano.

Sadly our little trio was not the romantic sounding Isabella or Ruby tiger moth variety, but the lowly fall web worm species, hated by gardeners statewide. The fun kid thing to do was release them and celebrate the event with a parade. Camden was in the lead with tambourine in hand, I followed with the remote control lady bug and Grandpa Mike had the honors of carrying the prisoners, the huaraches and his green purse. Upon finding a suitable site, the bug hatch door swung open and one of the creepy crawlers high-tailed it south, one cautiously held his/her ground, and one needed an ambulance.

The moral of the story is if you need to identify your favorite woolly worm, plant, insect or the slime growing in your bathroom, you can do so at Discover Life.org. Check out the "Lost Ladybug Project" which offers a low-budget video not even in the same class as the disco honeybees. I think the ladybugs need better sponsorship.

My favorite bugs!

Cranky Walking

2009-09-17T08:15:00.000-07:00

Finding "the zone" during your walk can be satisfying. You feel the glide, each limb in sync with the other, each foot rolling off the pavement on cue. When you finish, you are relaxed, happy and in love with the world. When you don't enter "the zone" your walk can turn cranky. Like the path you follow, your limbs jerk and twist, your feet drag and stumble and your toes complain. Your eyes and nose begin to itch and you silently respond with "oh shut-up" when a dog barks his morning greeting. From a passing motorists you elicit a kind thought concerning your neurological disorder and you want to quit.

Then you sneeze. You stop, cross knee over knee in the "Karate Kid" pose and pray only nasal fluids exit your body. You make it home, kick off your shoes in frustration and grab a Kleenex, a Zyrtec and take a picture(?). A fretful attempt to enter "the zone" before it's to late.

The Plot

2009-09-14T10:31:00.000-07:00

The headline should read "Glasses Found: Feared Spousal Conspiracy". It is an obvious plot to make me think I'm losing my marbles. In my frustrated search for my specks, I looked at this scene no less than four times. I think Jason Bourne has been in my house. He and Mike are conspiring to make me seek employment to save my sanity.

They have no idea who they are dealing with.

Routines

2009-09-14T09:44:00.000-07:00

Lollygaggers need routines. I know it seems ironic but routines are extremely useful. I spent the last two weeks establishing a new weekday morning routine, and blew it out of the water today. I did everything backwards and the result is I have lost my glasses. Only a confirmed lollygagger could lose their glasses in their own house.

So in an effort to save the day, I will abandoned the entire Monday routine and seek out something new! But first, I need to go to the store, the recycling center, vacuum, clean the bathrooms... I'm starting to doubt my credentials.

Dancing With Bees

2009-09-11T09:18:00.000-07:00

Apparently the honeybee population is in danger and this is serious stuff. But, you have to go to the provided link (see Good Stuff on the right) for a good laugh. Click on the Bee TV tab and get down with "Bee Dance Disco" and "Bee Dance Krumpin". My bet is the mirror ball trophy is a shoe-in.

Lonely Bee

2009-09-10T11:38:00.000-07:00

Once upon a time a lonely bee became lost from his colony and went looking for a new place to live. He found a lovely patio in Enid. He hoped to find a new friend.

The bee tried to make friends with this man, but Mike wasn't in a friendly mood!

So the bee hid underneath the patio table. He went head first into the little drilled screw opening. For days the Elmenhorst family tried to figure out what the lonely little bee was doing underneath the table. And then they discovered yellow stuff. The end.

Wall Art

2009-09-10T11:08:00.000-07:00

Print it, frame it and hang it on your wall per Vern Yip and "Deserving Design"!

Processing Jelly

2009-09-09T13:00:00.000-07:00

My solitary jalapeno plant has yielded a bumper crop this season and I'm going to try to make jelly. For this experiment I will be using the Ball Jar Co. formula. Four ingredients and 13 steps.

10:00 AM - Lollygaggers are improvisers. I don't have all the equipment I need for processing jalapeno jelly. My dilemma is what to do with the Southern Comfort slush occupying the large pan I will need for the hot water bath the filled jelly jars are looking forward to. Time for a break!

I did purchase rubber gloves and a jar grabber. These tools proved to be VERY important pieces of equipment.

11:00 AM - I'm chopping peppers and listening to Ronnie Kaye and "Diamond Girl". I recently re-discovered KOMA radio. I have school morning memories of my Mom fixing breakfast and listening to Danny Williams. She was not a lollygagger. She was fluffed and buffed before her family made an appearance in the morning. Way to go, Marjorie!

11:10 AM - Dear Ball Jar Company, please add a Step 14. Recommend wearing swim goggles and snorkel in preparation for the chemical reaction caused by the addition of apple cider vinegar to chopped jalapeno peppers. Wow, six cups is a lot of sugar. I'll bet my putter this pan will not be big enough.

11:45 AM - I had to switch pans, the spoon is sticky, the vent hood is roaring and my back aches. I'm trying to keep the jars and lids warm as recommended. I'm using a cake pan with a little water which is either powerful improvising or a potential lollygagger accident. All the fans in the house are buzzing and the smell of vinegar is in the air. Paul McCartney and Wings (liked him better as a Beetle) are singing and I am stirring. We have hard boil and counting down to 10 minutes to jar fill.

11:50 AM - The highly recommended liquid form of Pectin has been added and I'm stirring and boiling for one more minute. Now I'm worried my jars won't be hot enough and they will crack when I pour this green, snotty (sorry) looking stuff into them. It will leak down the cabinets and onto the floor and into the grout between all the tile. Our house has loads of tile. I could be faced with rivers of green grout in the event of such a disaster. Beginning to fill stressed. I thought lab work would be slow and boring.

12:00 AM - Six warm jars are filled to within 1/4 inch of their shelf life with jalapeno formula. The lids are in place and jar rims have been applied and adjusted until fingertip tight. They are placed in my make-shift jacuzzi of a processor and will be at soft boil under cover for 10 minutes. I'm dreading using my new jar grabber for retrieval. Directions caution one to REMOVE jars from the canner, set upright on a towel to cool, UNDISTURBED for 12 to 24 hours.

12:15 AM- I'm at the end of processing and there are six hot intact jars popping happily on my kitchen counter. I salute all my female ancestors who preserved home grown food for the people they loved. They were not allowed the luxury of being a lollygagger. If the results of this experiment produce lids without give, the family gets jalapeno jelly for Christmas. If there is give in the lid, we've got three weeks to eat this stuff up. As for future peppers - I see potential wall art.

Frustrated With Technology

2009-09-08T08:08:00.000-07:00

I can't understand why I'm not cooling down during this morning's yoga routine and discover the ceiling fan has been reversed. A creative electrician wired the fans and lights in the rooms of our house to remote switches and I can foresee a future of frustration in this set-up. Mike and I are baby boomers with a grandchild and aging parents and in each of the three bedrooms there are seven buttons, a toggle style off/on button, and your normal looking light switch.

This weekend Jennifer helped her Dad hook up the TV, DVD and DVR players to the remote speakers. Now I have to find one remote for regular TV, and up to three remotes to watch a movie. Then there is the living room ceiling fan light which periodically comes on by itself and requires a remote to turn off.

I'm also frustrated this morning because I can't figure out how to place multiple pictures within one blog entry. To date the only picture I had was e-mailed to me by a young blond in short shorts with an ability to speed text. Have you seen my cell phone? Enough said.

Golf Tournament

2009-09-05T12:15:00.000-07:00

The "Tee for Two" couples tournament was held Labor Day weekend at Pheasant Run. Since I'm teeing for one this weekend, I volunteered to help with food set-up. Something I've learned about lady golfers. They dress up! I show up in my "Bud's Pool, Bud's Rule" t-shirt and Dickie jean shorts and feel under dressed. The hat looks good though!

Word Etymology

2009-09-04T07:54:00.000-07:00

An Internet check resulted in the following word etymology for lollygagging: 0rigin unknown, first documented use (?) 1862. The word is an intransitive verb which means to fool around or dawdle. If you break it down further loll means to relax, pass time idly and gag means to trick or deceive. Further research resulted in two dictionaries spelling the word as lallygag, and a secondary meaning being to kiss or neck. For the purposes of this blog we will stick with any of the following definitions: dally, piddling around, to loaf, fool around (kiss or neck), and spend time aimlessly. All of the above can be applied to living life retired!

I did a random Google search for lollygagging and received 72,000 hits. There is a blog on the New Social Worker's website with the title "Lollygagging". I have worked with social workers and they definitely were not lollygaggers, but do deserve some lollygagging time! There was also "Liberal Lollygagging" and a YouTube type video of Craig Owens' acoustic rendition of the song "Lindsey Quit Lollygagging".

So now you know the word is legitimate and we all know some lollygaggers! It's almost 10:30 and I still haven't showered, my grocery list looks like scrambled eggs and I'm piddling around writing about loafing and Mike would just gag. Relax, I did start a load of laundry before turning on the computer!

Something new.

2009-09-03T11:54:00.000-07:00

I don't enjoy the art of writing with pen and paper, but find my thoughts aching (longing) to be placed in print. After a visual search of my book collection, I located two unread books on keeping a journal and five blank journals! So in the spirit of learning something new I've added Mirriam Webster to my favorites and a real book mark to Bird By Bird by Anne Lamott. Now after I get past step 3 in the "Blogger Getting Started Guide" my thoughts and activities will be logged for posterity. Stay tuned.